Thursday, 19 March 2009

A SINISTER FETISH


Of course, there's no accounting for orcish tastes, and they no doubt have a great variety of weird items in their pocketses - half-gnawed hobbit bones, genuine "One Ring to Rule Them All" souvenir copies, spare metal clubs, bits of string and whatnot; but the orcs of Nanduhirion have a strange and to me inexplicable fondness for dwarven breastplates. Anybody hunting orcs along the banks of the Mirrormere will soon find their packs cluttered up with stack upon stack of these items, since two out of three orcs seem to carry them. The question is, why? If they dropped battered orcish breastplates, it would make sense; but for these extra-large orcs, a dwarven breastplate is of no practical use whatsoever. It would certainly take a psychoanalyst of unusual skill and persistence to ferret out the reason behind this sinister fetish...

2 comments:

tony said...

Reminds me of goblins and their obsession with Honey and Oats recipes.

Kairos said...

Ah, yes... The infamous Honey and Oats recipe. Personally, I suspect that it contributes to some unusually hideous form of torture, deep in the goblin dungeons of Moria. Because if not, we are faced with the still more unnerving prospect of vegetarian (perhaps even vegan) goblins.